E=McSQUIRREL

Come see the movie that everyone is talking about!!! Number 1 in the box office for 3 consecutive weeks in Europe!!! This movie will make you laugh, cry, and, most importantly, SQUIRREL! Fun for the whole family (ages 17 and up)! Angelina Jolie stars as a lonely widow, Sheryl, who suffers a head wound and mistakes a squirrel for her deceased Nuclear scientist husband, Parker, played by Brad Pitt. But when word gets out that Parker might still be alive, the government, particularly an official named Joe, played by Will Smith, has to go out and see how much the squirrel actually knows. Things really heat up when Sheryl, thinking she is pregnant, finds out that the headaches and nausea she is experiencing are actually the symptoms of rabies. Does the squirrel really know as much as it seems? And is America really in danger? Coming this fall!

NASA vs Sharks

It’s the best pair up yet. Our country (America)’s favorite failing government funded space program decides that, in order to re-excite a nation starved and disappointed in an ongoing recession, to reboot one of nature’s most feared predators, the shark. Like in Deep Blue Sea, some British lady and a few Americans decide to do the whole making sharks smarter thing by giving them more brain parts. The twist is that NASA decides to take it a step further and give these water based creatures space suits and jet packs in order to help battle each other in a zero-degree environment in a new tax payer funded monthly death match. But when these newly smart and physically fit sharks become jaded with their meaningless lifestyle they schism into two groups, those that want to travel the depths of space and find new oceans to inhabit and those that want to stay and fight our kind until we are extinct. But the question is do we actually deserve to live? You decide (if you aren’t a shark)! Jack Nicholson and Demi Moore star as the voices of sharks Hube and MacDonahue in this eye-opening space thriller! Coming this summer!!!

Baby Got Back

Macaulay Culkin stars in this searing drama that questions the fine line that divides good and evil. Jack (Culkin) has everything, he has the hottest girl in school (Selena Gomez), he’s captain of the football team, everyone loves him. Even Jack will admit that life is really great. But when he wakes up one morning to find that all of his close friends have shown up at his doorstep as babies, he has to relearn what real values are and what being a friend is ACTUALLY about. Special Guest appearances from the entire cast of Justin Bieber’s music video to “Call Me Maybe.” Already taking home several awards at Cannes, people are definitely buzzing about “Baby Got Back.”

Don't Reign on my Parade

Newsweek calls it, “Robin Williams’ best drag performance since Mrs. Doubtfire.” Philip Seymour Hoffman and Dustin Hoffman play two out-of-touch virgin librarian brothers who decide to invest in a money-laundering scheme with the ultimate goal of placing themselves in control of all the Thanksgiving Day Parades in the North East. Will witty discourse and supportive parents, played by Robin Williams and Rick Hoffman, help these social outcasts in their well intentioned but most trying of all lessons? And will either of them finally lose their virginity? In this coming of age, if you’re over-the-hill, tale coming soon to a theater near you, Thanksgiving 2012.

Till Depth Do Us Part

The New York Times calls it, “a throwback to a generation we all wish history would pretend never existed.” Junior (played by Colin Farrel) stars as the one-eyed fighter pilot in a mythological third world war that rages in the mid-80’s. Also starring Jennifer Love Hewitt and Pauly Shore. His lack of depth perception might hurt him in the air but it definitely only helps him behind enemy lines where he ultimately crashes and meets Svatz (played by Pauly Shore) who knows very little English but relates to Junior for having lost the opposite eye. Together these one-eyed heroes team up, literally arm-in-arm and make their way through the depths of this world seeing distance like they never knew they could. But will trouble strike when they both fall for the same girl (played by Jennifer Love Hewitt)? This buddy comedy will make you cry, scream, and most importantly love. Coming to theaters summer ’13.

Salting the Wounds

That’s right guys, the news everyone has been waiting for, M. Night Shamlingalong is gearing up for his latest box office triumph, “Salting the Wounds.” In this beautifully shot masterpiece, M. Night Shamalamaonan plays Pierre, a destitute French chef with a penchant for mischief and a heart of pure gold. When he finds the woman of his dreams, Blanca, also played by M.Night Shamaloamamlam, he realizes that mischief and escargo just don’t mix. Will Pierre’s new love for Blanca cure him of his lies and deceit or will the only curing be done to a rack of lamb? This film will move you beyond words and best of all make you crave a crossaint. The Washington post says, “Oh there’s definitely a twist, and it will twist you good.” Coming Christmas day 2012.

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